Many rappers, especially those from “the MIA” (Miami) are obsessed with having a “ride or die chick.” Basically they want a woman who will be there for them through thick and thin, good and bad, free or incarcerated. Rappers like Trick Daddy and Rick Ross sprinkle their lyrics with verbal images of finding such a chick, while female artists like Trina brag about being that type of girl. But these lyrics beg the question, should a woman remain faithful to her man even when he’s locked up?
Nowadays, people will find any excuse to cheat — he doesn’t pay enough attention to me; I was drunk; I’m a free spirit and I can’t commit to just one person. But women from the “hood” live by a different code for the most part. If their man is good to them and handles business like he should (i.e. pays the rent; provides food and shelter for his family; finds a way to make ends meet), then she will hang on to him no matter what. She won’t give up a “good” man just because he has a couple of strikes against him.
However, while said good man is in prison, she does need her rent paid and food on the table, so she has a few choices: A) find an interim man to fill in, B) move back in with her mama or C) working the day shift at King of Diamonds using what she’s got to get what she needs.
Let’s consider the first option. If she finds a substitute man to take care of her while Thug Passion is locked away, there could be complications. Either or both parties could get attached to the other person, making it hard to separate when her man is released. Or someone could let the cat out of the bag in front of him, upsetting T.P., thus sending him back to prison for the O.J. Simpson-style murders. So that option is out of the question.
She could move back in with her mama, but who says her mama wants her back in the house? Mom is now free to do what she wants in her own house, including running around in a loose thong and licking sryrup off a 19-year-old’s perky pectorals. She doesn’t want her back in the house disrupting her flow. The day she left was the happiest day of her mother’s life, next to getting free tickets to Tyler Perry’s new play “God, Are There Any Straight Men Left?”
Working the pole at the local strip joint seems like a fun, fast way to earn cash. After all, lots of girls put themselves through college by stripping (ironically, I’ve never met a stripper with a college degree). But strip clubs are deceitful. In the 80s, strip clubs — or gentlemen’s establishments — we classy places where beautiful women put on erotic dance shows. Nowadays, any hooker looking for clients can slide her disease-infested man trap down the pole. And having a background in adult entertainment, I can safely say that 1 out of every 1 stripper is an escort. They won’t readily admit it, or they may not even consider themselves as such, but they are doing more than just sucking down Blue Long Islands in the champagne room. Finding a stripper who doesn’t escort is like finding a butcher who doesn’t eat meat. Not only will she get “turned out,” but the risk of contracting something and taking it back home to her man is highly possible.
So, what should you do if your man is locked up? First of all, how about trying to find a man with no priors or a criminal past. Or maybe becoming a little more independent so you’re not relying on Junebug’s hustling skills. If you’re man happens to get locked up depsite being an otherwise decent person, there should be open dialogue about what needs have to be met, be it financial, emotional or sexual. From there you can make a decision.